How To Achieve Your Dreams With A Notorious Pickup Artist Manual

I Game, you Game, we all Game for sex, love, and everything else

“What do you REALLY want, baby?” “To crush Elon Musk!” Photo by Анна Хазова on Pexels


Can you imagine all the effort they’re putting into that? If they took that effort and put it toward something constructive, who knows what they could accomplish. — Tom Cruise, in Neil Strauss’s The Game

Who knew that couch-jumping, Scientology-worshipping Tom Cruise would be the nearly sole Voice of Reason in Neil Strauss’s The Game, the notorious exposé about the lives, lifestyles, and trade tools of Pickup Artists (PUAs)?


He voiced what I’d been thinking.


I theorized there were few better at comprehending the female mind than PUAs determined to get laid, so I read The Game to better understand how men exploit female commonalities for manipulation, control, and abuse. We have to identify our own unconscious vulnerabilities, as it’s our job to protect ourselves better by eliminating them.


We’re not rank ingénues anymore.


I’ve explored a few of these vulnerabilities already, and likened our personal fixes to a psychological cybersecurity patch job.


I have to hand it to PUAs: They do know women better than many of us know ourselves. Condemn them all you want, but they’ve nailed us. (Ar ar.) PUAs exploit female brains like grand chess masters.


Author Neil Strauss went from nerdy, underlaid AFC (Average Frustrated Chump) to mPUA (Master PUA), codename Style, in just two years. His expose, The Game, gifted his fellow AFCs the Unholy Grail: The secrets to persuading women to spread their legs or lips (more recently, we could add butt cheeks) almost on command. Without courtship, drama, or barely even getting a name.


Rail all you want about the sheer misogyny, rank control and abuse of female psychology in the PUA community, but two truths emerged from this deep-dive into pickup artistry.


One, they’re impressively focused on a goal, and everyone has much we can learn from them, regardless of our life’s mission.


Two, not all the women were naive, helpless pawns in modern Casanovas’ webs of deception. Even for those who were, none were mindless programmed computer networks. We’re creatures with agency and free will. We can arm and fortify ourselves against such psychic assaults.


And we have much to answer for as well.


The Game vs The Rules


I’m embarrassed to admit several years ago I actually read the notorious Game-equivalent manual for women — The Rules: Time Tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right. Not for research, not ironically and not for the larfs. I’d concluded perhaps honesty wasn’t the best policy, after all, in nailing a man. Three years after getting dumped at 37, what did I have to lose? Treating single men with respect, decency and consideration had gotten me nothing but a pool of underachievers who I got the strong feeling were ‘settling’ for me because they had neither the looks nor the riches to get the younger, hotter chicks.


The ones I wanted to meet never wanted to meet me. The ones who did were several years older.


La plus ça change.


Maybe games-playing was what all men really wanted after all.


Every accusation you can fling at The Game you can hurl with equal force at The Rules.


Misogynist manipulation? Misandrist manipulation.


Rank dishonesty pretending you don’t want sex when you do? Pretend, equally, you aren’t interested in a monogamous relationship or marriage.


‘Freezing’ a woman out to make her think you just lost interest? Always wait a day or two to respond to his emails (in the years before texting), don’t seem too eager, then just dash off a few quick lines as though you’re all dolled up to go out and do something terribly exciting, and you only have a few minutes before your ride picks you up. Don’t you wish you were with me?


Tricking dumbass women to have sex? Tricking dumbass men to give it all up for you.

The Rules are The Game for women. And vice versa.


Image by Cottonbro on Pexels


Not all the advice in The Rules is bad. Useful: Cutting to the chase on singles sites. If after three rounds of messages he hasn’t asked you out, cut it off. He’s not serious. You’re there to nab a man, not a pen pal. Also useful: Advice for cutting through the carrot-sticking or ‘breadcrumbing’ many men use to string women along.

Still, there should be at least a few email rounds. Too many men think any messaging beyond, ‘Hi. You’re cute. Let’s meet for coffee and see if there’s chemistry; yes or no?’ is ‘endless messaging’.

Not only is it a clear sign he thinks with his Little Dicktator, but he still doesn’t understand we need to make sure he’s not, at the very least, a serial killer or something before we agree to meet.

Where The Game trumps The Rules many times over is in its granular dig-down into the psychology of both ‘targets’ or ‘sets’ (the dehumanizing words for women) as well as the PUAs themselves.

Strauss was a writer and interviewer B.S. (Before Style), so he was already experienced in emotional ditch-digging.

Why your Grand Vision needs The Game

Tom Cruise nailed it. The Game is like The Force; it can be used for good as well as evil. Where I had to respect PUAs was in their single-minded devotion to their cause, however worthy or unjust. It wasn’t always the latter. One badly-dressed Australian wannabe was more interested in finding a wife; others merely sought girlfriends rather than harems.

The Game encapsulates the focused devotion to accomplishment that lies at the core of any successful endeavor.

Whatever your Grand Vision is, whether it’s seduction or finding a spouse/partner, running your own business, writing a novel or becoming a brain surgeon, it remains a mere fantasy until you up your Game to: