Abstract Lights

How To
Avoid
Abuse

Boxing Session

Take back your power and get off (or avoid) what relationship counselor, TED talker and author Dina McMillan calls 'the hamster wheel' of abusive relationships. Recognize you now have choices, and resolve to make more informed ones. If more women stood up to toxic masculinity and refused them entry into their lives, or booted them out early, abusive men would be forced to shape up or jack off. Every abuser an incel!

Button
Candy Cotton
A book on dating app culture demonstrates how misogyny persists when women *allow* it. When we don’t tolerate bad men, they disappear.
 
Candy Cotton
A book on dating app culture demonstrates how misogyny persists when women *allow* it. When we don’t tolerate bad men, they disappear.
 
Candy Cotton
Candy Cotton
Books:

Conflict Is Not Abuse: Overstating Harm, Community Responsibility & the Duty to Repair - Sarah Schulman

     This is the antidote to Generation Snowflake and everything 'woke'! Schulman dives into the modern-day confliation of conflict or disagreement with abuse and explores the way misstating conflict and overstating harm hurts the individuals involved and further divides the society. Read this before you venture onto Facebook or Twitter!

Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry & Controlling Men - Lundy Bancroft

But He Says He Loves Me: How to Avoid Being Trapped in a Manipulative Relationship - Dina McMillan (My review)

The Game: Penetrating The Secret Society Of Pickup Artists - Neil Strauss (My review)

What Was He Thinking? The Woman's Guide to a Man's Mind - Dr. Mike Bechtle

Emotional Intelligence 2.0 - Travis Bradberry & Jean Greaves

It really is a lot simpler than most women think. Don't allow these guys into your life in the first place. Don't let them back. The first time he hits you must be the last.

Including...

I've found five stellar resources to help women identify their psychological weaknesses and inoculate themselves against the sort of toxic man who manipulates and abuses, but also to better understand men and thereby become better partners themselves. After all, she may be no walk in the park either.
Dina McMillan's book offers rock-solid advice on how abusive men think and strategize, and how to avoid them. If you read no other book your entire life on abuse and men, read THIS one. McMillan claims she can teach women and young girls to avoid a lifetime of abuse in two hours, and she's not kidding.
It's so tediously predictable. I no longer care anymore why women stay in abusive relationships. Let's learn to avoid them! There's a dating Best Practices beginning with recognizing the early red flags.
My friend did. She couldn't see the red flags. “Sandy,” I said, “your problem’s clear. You have a thing for abusive men. These macho types are danger boys. The ones you call ‘boring’ are the ones who don’t hit. What you value in men is messed up.”
My friend did. She couldn't see the red flags. “Sandy,” I said, “your problem’s clear. You have a thing for abusive men. These macho types are danger boys. The ones you call ‘boring’ are the ones who don’t hit. What you value in men is messed up.”

Assessing an abuser's claims of change

Dina McMillan's TED Talk 'Unmasking The Abuser' (see her book in the list)
To stop abuse, we must first understand 'grooming'